I learned my lesson last time about staying in Bangkok too long, yet it appears that I haven’t learned my lesson about making last-minute travel plans and hoping that they’ll work out. After shopping in Bangkok for two solid says, I wanted to find a quiet place to relax and enjoy the rest of my holiday. Koh Lanta, on Thailand’s southwest coast seemed to be the perfect location. The guidebooks said it was a peaceful island that hadn’t quite reached the saturation point. I had also heard pretty good reviews from fellow travelers and thought I would give it a try.

When I reached the airport, I was told that I was too late for the 12:30 flight to Krabi, but there was a 4:30 flight I could take. Unfortunately, this flight was sold-out and no other flights where heading to Krabi that day. My options where to stay in Bangkok (near the airport) as the travel agent suggested (earning them a commission) or fly to Phuket and take the early morning ferry to Koh Phi Phi.

As some of you may remember, I’m not fond of Phuket. It’s technically an Island, but so is Manhattan. Manhattan has been paved over, so has Phuket. 10 years ago, Phuket was a quiet little fishing village. Today, it is a sprawling resort town filled with every type of hotel, restaurant, and tourist shop imaginable. Least us forget that it also has more prostitutes than you can shake a stick at.

Being that I was now a 20-something male traveling alone in Thailand, I cringed at the thought that I would be labeled “one of those guys.” You see, Phuket is one of the world’s headquarters for sex-tourism. No, I’m not even making that up, people sit around and plan this stuff out. “Let’s see, Disney world with the family, or hookers in Thailand?” Large tour groups from Japan, Germany and other European countries come here all the time looking for … um … you know … a little bit of love (the paid kind). The island also has some pretty good dive trips, but mostly Phuket is known for the hookers.

I was out of options and would have to suck it up and fly to Phuket. I snuck up to the Thai Airways counter and quietly purchased my ticket, all the time clinging onto my dive bag as if to say: “see, I’m going to Phuket to dive. I love to dive. I can’t get enough of it. I like to go to bed early every night without prostitutes so I can get up early and go diving. I’m not a pervert, damn it! I’m not!”

I doubt it made any difference to anyone. In fact, after scanning the departure lounge at the airport, it was clear that I had nothing to worry about. The overweight forty-year-old German men traveling with the teen-age Thai girls, however, drew a little bit of attention. I’m all for buying child-brides, don’t get me wrong. But really, is it necessary to have her sit on your lap the entire time? You still need to buy a seat on the flight anyway, maybe she could use it? On the other hand, perhaps I had them all pegged wrong. I’m sure they had plenty in common. Maybe the Thai girls really enjoyed the intellectual conversation about ….

Ok, screw it, these men didn’t care what people thought and the girls had a better life because of it. It might seem odd, but its part of what makes Thailand such a wonderful place. She doesn’t hide things like this. She holds her flaws out in front of everyone to see, “Yes, our young girls are married, dating, or getting paid to have sex with fat old men. What are you going to do about it?”

It creeps me out a little bit, but I’ll get over it.

The flight was uneventful. When I landed in Phuket I grabbed a taxi at the airport, while others waited around in masses trying to cram themselves into packed mini-buses. I made it to my hotel, checked in and pretty much stayed there watching Discovery “Travel & Adventure” the entire night. Of course, that was after I had dinner at a Go-Go bar, but who’s keeping track of details?